katriona_s (katriona_s) wrote,
katriona_s
katriona_s

a stroll, and some confused ideas...

On Saturday my friend living in some faraway city came to Tokyo so I & 4 other friends gathered to see her. We enjoyed lunch, stroll on the edge of the Imperial Palace and in the nearby park, and easy talking together. The weather was not good, but because of the clouds the temperature was not too high, it's generally a pleasant day to walk.


(the edge of the Imperial Palace in Tokyo, maybe my first visit there :P)



It's good to see my friends, walking, but I made a mistake talking too seriously I'm afraid because of my recent tiredness... I talked of my feeling about the society, our national character, some difficulties in my job or in our life, etc... and my friends listened to me genuinely. But when they replied I found that I talked just about me and they talked just about them. It's just natural, we are all in the difficult ages when we are old enough to shoulder responsibilities & problems like getting better jobs, taking care of children or old parents, financial matters of the family, finding a good partner, and at the same time not old enough to give up our own dreams. Maybe all of us are too busy with our own problems and no time to think of our friend's worries.

Still they are my friends and their talking were at least some stimulation for me even though our conversation could never be the real exchange of opinions.
But... on my way home I asked to myself, what had I expected?
The feeling of friendship, maybe, it never depend on theory, not on clever conversation, it exists somewhere between the words. More I grow up, more I find it's becoming harder to feel the sympathies with my friends when I talk with them. The conversations might blindfold me from the real feeling of friendship?

On this web-journal, or on some communities, I feel genuine affections for my LJ friends, and they are not because of their words themselves I think. My feeling come from somewhere I could feel, not from logical understanding. When I think in my clumsy English sometimes I can feel I catch it but why on earth it's so difficult to grab the feeling of friendship in my own language? Good God...
Tags: thought, travel/going out
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